Merry Christmas!
Tomorrow is Christmas once again. Most people will be spending it with their parents, or spouses, or children. I, like a minority of people in America, will be spending it by myself. And though it is Christmas, I won’t be spending it quite like most people. While others are opening their presents, eating Christmas dinner, and other family traditions, I’ll be reflecting on Christmases past. I’ll remember how good I had it and the love that surrounded me. But I’ll also be giving thanks for how good I have it now too. Though some circumstances have changed, I’m still very blessed, and it’s important to acknowledge that. I am very grateful for my life. I hope you are too. I know there are good things coming too. All things in their time.
So in this season of hope, love, and happiness, I hope you have plenty of all of these.
Merry Christmas!
Happy Holidays?
It’s that time of year again, when we increase our weight and our debt in equal measures as we celebrate the holidays. It’s also the time of year to spend with ‘family’. Family, the word we give to the collection of people in our lives related to us by blood or marriage. And by far the biggest source of stress in most people’s lives at this time of year.
Before we go any further, I think it only fair to add this disclaimer: I am single and my family lives halfway across the country. What you are going to read is more than a little influenced by this.
Some of you now may be thinking that family is not a source of stress, and love spending as much time with them as you can at the holidays. If so, great! I’m very happy for you, and you are fortunate. The world needs as much happiness as it can get, and what I’m about to say won’t apply to you at all.
This question is for those of you who have ‘dysfunctional’ families. Ok, let’s take off the gloves and be frank. Chances are it’s not just dysfunctional, it’s downright toxic. My question is this: why do you do it? Why do you voluntarily subject yourself to situations, year after year, that make you miserable? Is there something compelling about the drama? I really don’t understand it.
I have friends that spend time with their family, being uncomfortable, unhappy, or are made to feel inferior, and then I hear about it later. Now, I have no problem with my friends venting to me when they need to – better to let it go than hold it in. But the question I still haven’t gotten a good answer to from any of them yet is, why is everyone else’s happiness more important than yours? I don’t mean that from a selfish only my happiness matters perspective, but a why are you making yourself miserable perspective. For me, if it comes down to someone has to be unhappy, it’s going to be someone else. And that’s not as bad as it may sound at first.
It’s not as bad because I’ve learned a very important lesson – the only person responsible for my happiness is me. Not my family, my friends, my pets, or anyone else. Me. I choose whether I’m happy or not, and sometimes I do that by not doing certain things, going certain places – or being with certain people. I’ll be honest – I love my family, but our relationship works much better with distance between us. It’s a big reason I still live half a country away.
In case you’re wondering, I’ll put this to rest too – I am currently single, no girlfriend, so no potential inlaws to deal with either, though I hope when my soulmate comes along that I’ll fit into her family really well. In the meantime, I’m perfectly happy for it to be me, the dog, the cats, and the tv as usual.
One last thing. If you’re still spending time around people that make you unhappy around the holidays, or any time, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Nothing will change until you do.
Happy Thanksgiving!
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BE the Change in Your World This Thanksgiving
Donating to the needy might not be at the top of everyone’s shopping list, but that’s why physical reminders of the importance of giving are needed. Caught up in the commotion of our own lives, we can all use help overcoming the distractions and indifference that prevents us from helping to alleviate suffering in our communities.
For many of us, it’s a Thanksgiving tradition to drop a few coins in the Salvation Army’s red kettle outside our local grocery. It’s quick, easy, and has real impact – last year, more than $139 million was raised by red kettles to provide services ranging from hot meals to warm beds for homeless and impoverished Americans.
This year the need is greater than ever, with more than 44 million Americans on food stamps.
While you’re out doing your grocery shopping today or tomorrow, be on the lookout for stressed-out impoverished moms who don’t have enough money to buy good food, and slip them a five, a ten, or a twenty. It is not going to make a difference in your life-style. And when you see those worn-looking children in the cart, or hanging on the moms, be sure to compliment the mom on what a good job she is doing, managing her child in a crowded store in these times when money is so tight.
It’s difficult to give people money sometimes without them acting a little insulted. Here’s how we do it: We put money in five or ten envelopes, inside a little card. On the outside, we write, “To a good mom.” On the inside, we write “Here’s your bonus for being a good parent. Maybe you can buy something extra healthy for your child and you to eat. Happy Thanksgiving from Someone who cares..”
Then I say “Congratulations,” and slip away.
Pledge to do your part to fight hunger in your own community this holiday season. In giving thanks this week for what we have, let’s not forget to also extend a hand to those in need.
BE the change in your world.
“I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something.” Helen Keller
The True Spirit Of Christmas
There is a lot of controversy and confusion in people’s minds over Christmas and its meaning both in our personal lives and in the world. With the commercialization and secularization of Christmas, the true “reason for the season” has been lost for generations.
Christmas isn’t just about capitalism and candy. It isn’t just about singing and Santa and fattening foods and toys. Many people today are desperately searching for deeper meaning for this Holiday season. Now, more than ever, they recognize they need it, not just for themselves or those they love. They need it for the sake of the thousands of chairs that will sit empty on Christmas Day.
Some people feel it is an exclusively Christian holiday, holding no special meaning for them. Others believe it is nothing more than a feeding frenzy for the free market and an excuse to get people to open their wallets at every turn. Others take the viewpoint that it is a holy day that is cheapened and diminished by all the garish festivities. Yet few, if any, when really pressed, are willing to give up the Christmas holiday, in spite of their ambivalent feelings.
The reason for this is because of the real meaning behind the Christmas season. A meaning that we all somehow psychically feel even though our own intellect doesn’t fully comprehend what all the fuss is about.
That hidden meaning is that Christmas is the festival of the human heart. It is a time of year when all the universe conspires to raise the vibratory level of consciousness on earth to one of peace and love toward ourselves and one another. This season resonates to the sweet, childlike innocence that resides in all of us. A time when the heavenly forces inspire us to shift our focus away from fear and toward one of joy, and healing.
The Christmas festival emphasizes this shift in two ways; one is the rebirth of the soul and the second is the return of the light to earth. Even before the rebirth of Christ which centers around our modern day Christmas festival, as far back as recorded history, in fact, these two themes of rebirth and light have emerged again and again during this time of year.
It is as if Divine Consciousness moves forward year after year, during the darkest season, to bring us back to light.
Yet even knowing the true meaning of the Christmas season is not enough to convince some people of its importance. “Peace! Goodwill! Humbug!” they cry just as Scrooge did in the famous Dickens fable. “These are nice ideas but no more than a fantasy. I feel no peace. No goodwill!”
Yet there is a way to feel this vibratory shift. There is a way in which your own heart can experience the love and light pouring into the earth’s vibration from Divine Source. That way is to participate in the rituals of the season.
No matter who you are, your heart cannot resist the beauty of an ornamented Christmas tree or the glow of a mysterious menorah. Cynicism gives way to the celebration when carefully preparing holiday sweets or stringing colorful lights around the entrance to your home. Any heart warms to a rousing rendition of “Joy to The World” or the sensuous smell of roasting chestnuts on a crisp winter’s eve.
Sadness leaves when carefully choosing gifts to delight and surprise those you love. The heart feels rich and fulfilled as you wrap them in beautiful paper and bows. For just a while, through partaking of the whim and richness of the season, life takes on an extraordinary hue, one of sweetness and safety. Something psychic and healing happens to our hearts as we enjoy layer upon layer of these sensual seasonal delights. These rituals open the heart chakra and allow us to feel and express the innocence and beauty of being a child of the universe.
Each occasion we create to feel the vibrations of Christmas helps raise the consciousness of the planet and return it to balance. For every person creating joy, there is one less person in pain.
These are the ways to experience the vibrational shift toward light that occurs during this season. But there is one more thing you can do to amplify this experience a thousandfold.
That is to enter the season of Christmas with the intention of being a personal messenger of light and love, and celebrate in the name of service to Divine Consciousness.
Nothing transforms the ordinary into the extraordinary more directly than the intention to do what ever you are doing with the desire to serve Higher Power.
When we celebrate the season with such an intention and desire, we not only experience Christmas we actually become Christmas: an agent of rebirth of the soul and the bringer of light.
Therefore, if the best gift you can give to yourself and the world during this holiday season is the gift of self love, So be it.
Wishing everyone a Blessed Holiday Season and a New Year filled with love, grace, gratitude, peace, joy, balance, and truth.
x0x0x0x
LillyAnn
How to Make the Season Bright
We’re coming into a time of the year when certain conditions of the human consciousness glare. This time of the year is intended to be the happiest time of the year according to popular culture, but for most it’s not only not the happiest time of the year, it’s often the most conflicted time of the year. All of the unattended-to things relative to family and friends — all of the shortcomings that one has lived out for eleven months — suddenly pop up to the forefront when it’s time to make amends, buy gifts, have family meals, and enjoy the happy tidings. If you’re going to become a different kind of human being, gradually you will need to see what I’m going to speak of.
There are all kinds of movements. This room — as relatively still as it is — is filled with movements, but they’re invisible movements. There is the movement of the person sitting next to you, however subtle that may be; there is the movement of the air around us caused by breathing, caused by the fireplace; there is the movement of thoughts and feelings, and the movement of invisible energies that these thoughts and feelings produce that emanate, radiate from the body; and there is the interaction of those radiations of two different people sitting next to each other and having the experience of whatever it is that energy brings out. But all of these movements, by and large, are almost completely ignored. They’re ignored, not because we choose to ignore them, but because we live from a nature that is isolated, cut off from any awareness of these movements. Not only are we not aware of these movements, we’re not aware of the movements inside of ourselves.
If I was to ask how many of you have been aware three times in the last ten minutes of the movement of your own thoughts and feelings, I can virtually guarantee that a small number of you might raise your hands, and amongst those, maybe one or two actually saw the movement of something. Being identified with something is not seeing the movement of something.
There are levels and scale of movement in this room, even as I’m talking with you, even as my words may move you one way or the other. There is the movement of the world, and there is the movement of spirit. They are two different things. One precludes the possibility of a human being ever understanding anything about compassion, about love, and the latter (the movement of spirit) is itself the embodiment of things that are compassionate, true, good, and loving.
The world that you are in now — when you’re not aware of the movement of virtually anything — is the world in which you are part and parcel, fully a part of the movement of the world. The movement of this world is completely governed by the movement of desires that have nothing that oversees them except for whatever dominates the particular individual in whom that desire manifests itself in the moment.
Therefore, a person is virtually blind, deaf, and dumb relative to the degree to which he or she is identified with these movements inside of themselves, and cannot see at large the movement of themselves in the world because they are the world that is moving. Now, maybe that doesn’t mean much to you, but I’ll tell you something about it — something that I saw recently.
My husband and I had gone to Costco [a giant warehouse store] in order to pick up some supplies for the Office. Costco is a perfect microcosm of the human brain. It is loaded with more things than one needs, set out in attractive aisles for the purpose of catching one’s eye (just as thoughts, desires, and feelings are), and it’s filled with individuals — not one of whom even knows they’re in the store, who knows the movement of their own thoughts and feelings.
Relative to that picture, imagine all of these thoughts and feelings running around the mind (just like in Costco), trying to get their hands on what they want to get their hands on — lots of discounted deals, lots of bright things for the future to make one happier — with thoughts bumping into each other, carts running each other over. Someone sees something and you see it at the same time, and you want the pasta before they get it. Have you ever run into your own thought?
Here are a thousand people in a giant store, and the purpose of that store (of desire) is to bring one to the desired object. If the store wants something to stand out, someone must actually make it stand out, so (particularly at this time of year) there are always a half a dozen or so people standing in front of little carts with microwaves and skillets, preparing tasty morsels for human beings to sample.
The human beings standing there, waiting to get their tasty morsel, are irritated by the fact that they have to wait in line to get it, or that the woman preparing it is too slow – because they’re part of a movement that can’t see anything except for the desire in front of their own eyes. They can’t see that 75-year-old woman, skin like tissue, thin and worn, hands old, eyes bleached (from the same kind of life that we’ve lived, I might add, that we’ve all been a part of). Hardly anyone says “thank you.” Not one person there thinks to themselves, “How is it that I’m in relationship with this poor old woman, irritating me because she’s not giving me my pleasure fast enough?”
There is a monster at large. It is in our body. There is a monster at large that doesn’t care about anything other than what it needs in order to feel about itself what it has named as being primary for that moment. That’s all.
There is in me — just as there is in all human beings — a nature who has a vested interest in keeping out any impression whatsoever that makes me see that the world I am walking through is how it is because of what that nature is. No one wants to suffer the fact that the world they see is what it is because of the way they are. Why? Because then I’m going to have to meet this thing that doesn’t see but just wants. I have to meet this thing that doesn’t consider anything outside of itself other than what is necessary to support whatever it is feeling about itself in the moment.
Here is all of this movement, and part of that body of human beings is all moving towards a poor old woman who is moving to satisfy that movement, and not one part of any of that movement has consciousness of any other part. That’s what it means to be dead and blind.
Until a person begins to separate from this incessant movement in themselves, there’s no chance for them to ever know a life that isn’t part of the denigration of the spirit because of that incessant movement. It’s impossible.
But what a suffering is involved. I have to stop feeding myself. I have to stop having enemies. I have to stop thinking about people. And most important, I have to stop putting myself at the center of the universe because all the things I think about, even those I think I care about, still put me at the center of the universe.
All of this movement that I’m talking about, which we absolutely don’t see because we’re swept away in it, precludes us from seeing anything else that’s in that movement.
To be blinded means to be out of relationship with what’s around you. And the point of spirit, as opposed to the movement of the world, is that spirit (what is true) is always in relationship with what is around it. It’s never not conscious of its relationship to life because gradually a human being begins to recognize that it’s mandatory to become still. Without stillness there is no hope for transformation.
You have to examine yourself and see how stimulated you are by movement that you come up with that has to do with the plans by which your spiritual works are going to change you. All your plans and knowledge, your gabbing and convincing one another of what you have and how things ought to be, doesn’t change anything – it just makes you part of the “Costco consciousness” of spiritual beings.
True spirituality has its root in a very, very dear payment that begins with an individual becoming conscious of himself, in the world, as he is, and as the word is. Then because of that, by the very consciousness that he has of the condition inside of himself and its relationship to the world that condition has produced as a result of his unconsciousness of it, then change becomes necessary. It’s not a question anymore that a person wants to change. They’re staggered by the fact of what they are. You’re not staggered at all by what you are. You’re quite pleased with what you are because presently what you are is filled with your plans to become something different. All plans to become something different are garbage. If you have a spiritual future, you have nothing but the repetition of what you have been.
Be different this year by being different now. Try to see past the movement of your own mind. The only way to see past the movement that is generated by desire and the mind is for there to be something still in you. If there is nothing still in you, then you are part of all of that movement.
You go out to the supermarket, the shopping centers, the mall. By and large you waste your money, trying to find a way to feel good about what you’ve been and done over the year by making it up to someone at this time. You want to know how to make it up to someone? Don’t hurt them. Don’t take from them. Don’t stand in front of them and wait for them to give you what you want so that your appetite can be satisfied. Give them something. Give them your attention. Find out where you can be a little bit of light instead of a stone around somebody’s neck.
I know that it doesn’t sound like much, but I can assure you that one person standing in a crowd of five, ten, or fifteen people, recognizing the fact and the actuality of the condition they’re in, coming wide awake and bearing some of the pain that’s inherent wherever human beings are gathered for the purpose of satisfying themselves, that such a tiny act not only changes that moment but changes the whole of the world that you and I have been a part of.
This is what the holidays are about, as far as I’m concerned: Where is it possible for me to step out of the worldly movement and into the stillness of spirit that can be a part of the world but is not in it in the way that I am when I am part of that blind movement to satisfy myself?
When the shoe fits, change the foot… it’s not easy to change one’s foot, meaning to change one’s psychology, but I can assure you, if you don’t do that work, you will be part of a blind force that is consumed by a blind force, and that ends in a blind force.
On the other hand, this time of the year, you do what you can, wherever you can, and suffer what you must consciously. Cease to be a part of what is destroying this earth and the soul inside of you, and you become part of the creation of a new world that begins within you and is finally expressed in a Light that dawns and is born upon the earth.
A Holiday Reminder
November 23, 2008 by Lilly
Filed under Holidays, Kindness, Personal Growth
The last month of the year 2008 is about to begin. It’s an exciting time. Halloween has come and gone, and now we have Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Eve to await. Many will be observing Hanukkah and Kwanzaa.
There will be many celebrations and gatherings to come, religious rituals observed, shopping expeditions or nightmares (unless you’re already finished), card and gift exchanging, and many meals shared. At least that will be the case for many.
For others, the season will be a time of sadness, loneliness, want, need, and perhaps, even despair. As we go about our holiday routines, it is worth remembering that not everyone will be celebrating with their usual flair. Many Americans lives are in upheaval. They will be missing loved ones the most during this time, juggling finances to pay their bills, trying to ensure their children receive at least one item on their Christmas lists, worrying about job security, having the funds to pay January’s living expenses, and pondering what 2009 holds in store for them. Others have known a difficult year and don’t hold much hope for the remainder of it.
Every year, we are reminded at this time of year to remember the true meaning of the holiday season. Depending on your religion or faith, it will be different things to different people. However, they are all variations on a theme: love, peace, hope, and generosity of mind and spirit. And, for those who may not practice any religion—formal or personal (spiritual)—it is still worth remembering what matters most to you and not allow yourself to be swept up into the holiday madness.
The following are some ideas to revisit often over the weeks to come. Embrace them or not, but do consider them.
1. Avoid Stress.
Don’t spend more than you can afford, go to too many parties or events, or lose yourself in work. Try to maintain a balance in your life. If you are worried about having a job next year, don’t go on a spending/gift-buying spree you cannot afford for one day in the year. If you find it difficult to accept gifts when you know you cannot afford to reciprocate, tell your family and loved ones you would like to exchange gifts next year when you are more certain of your finances. Accept and extend invitations as appropriate to your schedule. If you have much to accomplish at work, don’t go to parties just because you’ve been invited. Keep your schedule realistic. In addition, work will always be important because it represents your livelihood; however, it is not more important than the people in your life. Make time for them and try to be available to them.
2. Be Generous.
Give to others what you can and give from the heart. If money is an issue, then give your time. Volunteer at a charity organization. Help others whenever you can—one person at a time. This could translate to giving someone a ride home or picking someone up if they’re having car trouble, offering soothing words of comfort to someone who is unhappy, or giving another a spontaneous hug. As always, giving can bring so much more into one’s life than receiving. Offer whatever you can to others. You have no idea how deeply your kindness could be received and appreciated.
3. Be Understanding.
Holidays aren’t happy for everyone. In fact, statistics show that it is during this season that that the suicide rate goes up. So when dealing with others, try to be patient, positive and present during your interactions. Hear what they are saying to you. They may seem fine or happy on the outside, but be facing numerous challenges and struggles you couldn’t even imagine. Remember this especially when dealing with customer service representatives, waiters/waitresses, attendants, and anyone else with whom you come in contact. Let’s hope that no one would ever go home and commit suicide because you lost your temper with him or her. However, what if you’re the one who drives another over the edge? Do you want to take that chance? If you have an issue with someone, speak calmly and honestly on the issue—not on the person’s character or worth to the world.
4. Focus On the Big Picture.
This is one moment, day, week, month out of an entire year and an entire lifetime. It’s natural for some to be difficult or challenging. Don’t let the frustrating ones cause you to lose your balance. Remember at all times the person you want to be. Stay aware and be that person, the together and generous one who takes all things in stride. And, if you do have a bad moment and say or do something you regret, remember it’s never too late to apologize. As someone who once worked with the flying public, I cannot tell you how special it is to have an irate passenger who was rude or clearly dealing with other issues come back and apologize for his or her behavior. Not only does it wipe the slate clean with me, but it tells me much about the person’s character.
5. Have Intentions – Make Them Good!
Have a plan and have things you want to accomplish over the holiday season. Be true to you. Have great fun and don’t over-extend yourself in any way. Don’t spend, eat, drink, or work too much. Enjoy the holidays, being alive, and sharing moments with loved ones. Know your areas of concern and respect them—as well as your limitations and boundaries—as you go through each day and moment of this holiday season.
“LOVE AND YOU SHALL BE LOVED” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
6. FORGIVENESS & REBIRTH It’s a good time to make amends and dissolve old grudges. The gift of forgiveness will warm the hearts of both you and the forgiven. Once you have forgiven, embrace the moment, and let go of all hostility towards the person and incident you are forgiving. Go forward and start anew, a rebirth of your relationship. Do not bring up the subject ever again, just erase it from your memory.
7. ACCEPTANCE & RESPECT Accept your loved ones as they are, do not try to insist they change or do something for their own good. Respect their wishes, way of life, and right to be as unique and individual as you are. Nobody is perfect and no one likes to be told how they should feel or what they should do with their life.
8. COMPROMISE & COOPERATION Give in a little and compromise. It is the holiday season for the whole family, so consider sharing the children, grandchildren, activities and cooperating for the good of holiday. If each family member does cooperate in some way, no one will feel slighted, left out or disappointed.
9. PRAISE & ACKNOWLEDGE An unexpected compliment does wonders to break the ice. Conversations often start when someone acknowledges something good about another person. It is infectious, “I love your dress” and “your home is decorated so beautifully”, will certainly be graciously accepted and appreciated.
10. AFFECTION & WARMTH I confess I am a hugger, even when I meet friends of family or friends for the first time, I shake hands while being introduced, upon departing I usually hug them. I trust my first impression of the person and instinct takes over from there. For your loved ones, hugs and kisses are usually accepted warmly. The best huggers are babies, children and elders. They all accept the warmth of a hug and squeeze without wanting to let go.
11. GRATITUDE & GRACE Count your blessings, and consider the gathering among them. Graciously accept compliments, gifts and hospitality. Think before you comment on a gift you receive. The giver has taken the time and tried their best to please you. Politely thank each person who presents you with a gift.
12. COMPASSION & SUPPORT If you know someone is having an exceptionally hard time dealing with a tragedy or crisis, offer your support and a shoulder if they should need to talk. Spend a few minutes finding out how they are, and make plans to meet in a few days to discuss their situation privately. Then attempt to change the subject to a mutual interest or help them get involved in the activities of the gathering.
13. COMPANIONSHIP & TRUST A friend, sibling, mate or pet are treasured companions. We all need a honest, open and trusting relationship with someone in our lives. Nurture these relationships with honest and open communication and commitment. The gift of loyal companionship is a blessing to embrace and not to be taken for granted.
14. SHARE & INSPIRE Giving something of yourself, sharing your knowledge and teaching by interacting with the world around you, will inspire others to do the same. The blessings of our own personal lives are many and these blessings help us endure and overcome the unexpected trials. Inspiration is a gift we all have to give, share your inner feelings about life, your spirit and acceptance to the world of love around you. Unexpected happiness and love will be your reward.
Tis the season for love, giving, sharing, wisdom, insight, good will, and being true to yourself and others. All the best to you and yours!
Recycled Glass Tree Globes
November 22, 2008 by Lilly
Filed under Arts, Creativity, Holidays, Shopping, Uncommon Goods
Beauty, elegance and heartfelt sentiment are at the root of artist Stephen Kitras’ latest collection of glass globes. Hand blown of 100% recycled glass, this series features Kitras’ signature ability to create a delicate interior trunk within the globe. Vibrant splashes of color add the finishing touch on these one-of-a-kind home accents. Handmade in Canada. Sold individually.
Tree of Family (far left)
Like the roots of a tree, family nourishes and encourages us to grow to limitless possibilities. The Tree of Family reminds us that no matter how far we branch out as individuals, our family is always there for support, for encouragement, and above all for love.
Tree of Peace (middle left)
The beauty and tranquility of nature in essence captures the meaning of peace. Like a tree growing in harmony with the forest that surrounds it, peace brings with it a message of tolerance, acceptance and compassion.
Tree of Joy (middle right)
Delight in vibrant mix of life’s simple pleasures. Like a tree bursting into life after a long winter, spread the joy you feel today with those around you. The Tree of Joy reminds us that performing small acts of kindness can help make the world a more joyful place.
Tree of Love (far right)
There is no greater gift in the world than the gift love. Like a tree, love grows stronger and more beautiful with time. The Tree of Love represents the countless blessings the love brings into our lives.
