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By David DeAngelo, Author Of “Double Your
Dating”
NOTE: Somewhere in this article I reveal to you an
almost magical technique that I've NEVER revealed before... not in a
newsletter, not in my book or other products, not in my live seminars...
not ANYWHERE. This particular technique is one of those "gems" that you
can use in many situations with women... one that has the power to
instantly transform the energy between you and a woman into an almost
INSTANT ATTRACTION...
Here's an interesting thought:
Ask 100 attractive women if they know what the words "Chemistry" and
"Sexual Tension" mean, they'll all nod their heads and say "Of course!".
Ask 100 guys off the street if they know what the words "Chemistry" and
"Sexual Tension" mean, and about 98 of them will give you a dumb look
and say "Uh, not really". A few will probably say things like "Um, is
Sexual Tension like when you and a chick are having sex in a weird
position and you get a cramp?".
The reality of this situation is that most attractive women know EXACTLY
what Chemistry and Sexual Tension are... and they can describe them in
DETAIL... but most men have literally NO IDEA... they're completely
clueless. Think about that.
I'm talking about an incredible phenomenon here...
How is it POSSIBLE that one of the most important aspects of attracting
a woman is something that most men know NOTHING about? And how is it
that almost ALL attractive are totally "in the know" about this stuff?
Is there some kind of strange conspiracy against men?
Are women keeping a secret from us guys just so we won't be able to
break the code?
Maybe.
I mean, think about it...
If you were an attractive woman, would you want to find a guy that you
had to TEACH the concepts of Chemistry and Sexual Tension to... or would
you want a guy who just "got it" on his own... "naturally"?
Duh.
You'd want the guy who already "got it".
So more likely than a conspiracy against clueless men, women just
naturally respond to men who GET IT, and DON'T respond to men who DON'T.
So let's talk about these concepts a little bit more. When a woman uses
the word "Chemistry", as in "There was chemistry between us" or "I want
to meet a man and have natural chemistry", she's talking about
ATTRACTION.
Chemistry is about a woman perceiving that she and a guy are "naturally
compatible" because her emotional and physical sparks fly when she meets
or is around that guy.
NOTE: I did NOT use the word "logical" here.
Chemistry is NOT the result of a woman meeting a man and then thinking
to herself "Let's see... he is six feet tall, has a good job making 37%
more than the medial salary, is the correct age for child rearing... I
think that we have a natural chemistry...".
Nooooo way. For a woman, Chemistry is either THERE, or it ISN'T. There's
no two ways about it.
Unfortunately, most guys hear the word "Chemistry" and they think it
somehow equates to "The guy must be good-looking so the girl thinks he's
sexy... and since I'm NOT the most handsome guy alive, women won't feel
it with ME". This is only because most guys don't get that you can make
a woman feel ATTRACTION for you REGARDLESS of your looks, age, income,
height, or anything else.
So let me repeat:
"Chemistry is about a woman perceiving that she and a guy are "naturally
compatible" because her emotional and physical sparks fly when she meets
or is around that guy."
Now let's talk about Sexual Tension. Sexual Tension is about the
interaction.
It's that feeling you get when you're in the presence of someone you're
attracted to, but there are OBSTACLES, ANTICIPATION, HUMOR, and/or other
ingredients in the mix that both increase the ATTRACTION, and increase
the TENSION in the situation. Sexual Tension is the combination of being
pulled toward someone, but also feeling resistance at the same time.
It's about not knowing what's going to happen, but being on the edge of
your seat WANTING to know what's going to happen.
Think of it this way...
If a woman KNOWS that she has you right from the beginning, she won't be
as interested... this is why so many guys kill their chances with a girl
instantly by going "overboard" and doing too many things to demonstrate
his interest. But if she DOESN'T know whether or not you're interested,
and you keep the mystery up, while making her more and more interested,
she will think about you ALL THE TIME.
This is creating Chemistry, and increasing the Sexual Tension.
Will a woman feel more ATTRACTION for a guy who always talks to her when
he sees her, always calls her, and is always available?
No.
She'll feel more attraction if he's more mysterious, challenging, and
unpredictable. Remember, Sexual Tension is GOOD for attraction, not bad
for it...
So let's talk about some great ways to create Sexual Tension... which
will NATURALLY lead to that magical feeling of CHEMISTRY. Here are a few
of my favorite ways to create and amplify Sexual Tension:
BE COCKY & FUNNY
Being Cocky & Funny, or using Cocky Comedy, is a fun, interesting,
enjoyable way to create and amplify Sexual Tension.
The formula is:
Start with an arrogant thought, then add humor to complete. If you're
standing in line waiting for your coffee, and you notice an attractive
woman behind the counter, you could say "Hurry up, you're not working
fast enough" in a serious tone of voice. That's arrogant. It's cocky.
But it's not at all FUNNY. You'd sound like a jerk-off if you said that
in a cold way.
If instead you said "Hey, since you like me and this line is always
long, how about if I just walk to the front from now on and you give
me free coffee?"... Now that's a whole different story.
If that same girl behind the counter goes to take your money, and drops
it, you could say "You're a klutz, watch what you're doing". If you did,
you'd sound rude and stupid.
On the other hand, if you start shaking your head, roll your eyes, and
breath out through your nose loudly in a dramatic way like you're
completely annoyed with her (in a funny way), you're going to make her
laugh.
Good thing.
These are examples of being Cocky & Funny, or using Cocky Comedy.
WAIT TO CALL HER
What do most guys do when they get a girl's number or email address?
Right, then call or write three minutes later. "Hi, it was great meeting
you a few minutes ago... so, what are you doing?"
OUCH.
Calling or writing a woman immediately is one good way to destroy any
anticipation or Sexual Tension that was present in the moment.
On the other hand, if you call up two days later and say "Hey, what up?
I'm busy tonight, and tomorrow, but let's do something on Friday. Here's
my number, call me... I gotta go..." that's a TOTALLY different type of
communication. By day two, she's already wondering why you haven't
called, wondering if you're getting back together with your ex that
she's imagining being a model... and generally beginning to wonder if
and when you're going to call.
Waiting builds tension. Do it. And do it after the FIRST call as well.
Learn to become comfortable not knowing what's going on... and waiting
to find out. It's MUCH better.
TWO STEPS FORWARD, ONE STEP BACK
This is the ultimate formula for AMPLIFYING a woman's anticipation,
arousal, and interest in you. Moving two steps forward, and one step
back takes Sexual Tension, and it DIALS IT UP.
The idea is simple:
Every time you make "progress" in a romantic way with a woman, STOP.
Then lean back. For instance, if you have been talking to her, and you
start holding hands... after a few minutes, TAKE YOUR HAND BACK. Then
lean back physically, and move away from her for a little while. If you
wind up kissing a little while later, STOP kissing her, and lean back
again.
Get it?
Women don't get turned on quite the same way men do. Men are on/off
switches. Women are volume knobs... that need to be turned up gradually.
If you show some self-control, make her feel good, and then go two
forward, one back you will give a woman an experience she'll really
enjoy, and won't forget...
TEASE HER
Women LOVE teasing when it's done in the right way. Some people think of
teasing as "making fun of"...
Now I DO love to make fun of women... but I'm talking about a different
type of teasing right now. I'm talking about the type of teasing where
you give someone a LITTLE BIT of what they want, then take it away so
they want it MORE. I'm talking about leaning in to kiss a woman, then
stopping right before you kiss her... so she can feel your lips just
about to touch hers, and then staying there for just a moment...
...and then LEANING BACK.
You're teasing her. You know that she wants you to kiss her, but you're
NOT kissing her. You're in control, and she loves it, hates it,
and WANTS IT.
Teasing increases Sexual Tension rapidly. You can tease in many ways...
Next time you're buying something, when the girl behind the counter
reaches out to take your money, put it in her hand, then quickly take it
away as she grabs it.
That's teasing. It's fun, and you can use it almost everywhere for the
enjoyment of both you and her...
ANOTHER REAL-WORLD EXAMPLE
Let's say you and a woman are out together, and you're enjoying your
evening. She decides to throw out one of those types of questions that
you're not expecting, but that seem DESIGNED to throw you off...
She asks the question... "Do you think we'll ever have sex?" Now, most
men will answer "I hope so" or "why, do you want to?"
Sexual Tension KILLED. She asks "Do you think we'll ever have sex"...
You answer "Only in your dreams... and calm down, just because I'm out
with you doesn't mean I'm going to sleep with you"...
Sexual Tension AMPLIFIED.
When she asked the question, she was TESTING you... she wanted to know
if you were going to bite down on the bait. She was finding out if you
were REALLY as in control as it seemed. You either pass or fail those.
The more you watch for, listen for, and pay
attention to Sexual Tension, the more you'll begin to NOTICE it. And the
more you NOTICE IT, the more you can start to control it, amplify it,
and direct it.
A FAVORITE WAY TO CREATE CHEMISTRY AND SEXUAL TENSION
I'm going to share a FANTASTIC technique with you right now, so turn on
your thinking cap, and remember this one. This is a great way to let a
woman know that you understand Sexual Tension and Chemistry, while at
the same time CREATING THEM.
Let's use a real-world situation.
Maybe you had responded to a few online personals, and some women have
written you back...
And lets say that one of the women said "tell me more about yourself",
etc. Let's further say that in her online personal profile she mentioned
that she loved cats...
You might write her back, and say:
"Here's a little more about me... I'm sitting on my favorite chair,
reading a magazine. You walk into the room, and the air shifts... you
slowly and carefully walk up to where I'm sitting, and rub up against my
leg... I look down at you, and you look back at me... "Meow", you say...
I reach down, and gently stroke your head... and you go running away...
like a typical kitty cat..."
If you are acting like a MAN, being Cocky & Funny, communicating that
you're in control of yourself and the situation, etc., something like
this can be MAGICAL.
A story like this one communicates sooooo many things at once... things
that would take you literally weeks of "regular" communication to convey
to her. A little story like this one, at just the right time can create
so much Sexual Tension, and spark the Chemistry so fast that you'll
often INSTANTLY take things to a different level with a woman. Now,
there's a very important factor that you MUST understand...
You CANNOT do this, create a little story like this, and try to use this
way of talking to a woman if you're acting like a WUSSY. This can only
be used in the context of you having communicated that you're a MAN...
and one that understands ATTRACTION, at that. If you try to do this kind
of thing before you've communicated that you're a masculine, powerful
guy, you're only going to make a woman RUN away.
So now that you understand Chemistry and Sexual
Tension... and finally had someone explain these amazing concepts to
you... what's the best way to learn the other keys to making women feel
ATTRACTION for you?
Did this article shine some light on your present dating success and
how you can improve? Sure it did.
I know it did, because I've been there. As a result
of my sharing what I know to guys like you, (I receive emails from guys
every day that have dating advice questions) I can honestly say that you
need to take two more steps to start your own successful dating
lifestyle.
First:
click here and join my free weekly newsletter. That's where I answer
the most interesting and original of the advice questions I get daily
from guys that want to date more and better.
Second:
Download my ebook "Double Your Dating". I sell it for only $19.97
and you'll find inside the ebook more of the successful techniques,
tried and true, that help any guy get the dates he wants. And it comes
with THREE great bonus booklets that aren't available anywhere else.
Get serious now. End disappointment. Start here:
www.DoubleYourDating.com
And I'll talk to you again soon.
Your Friend,
P.S. Do some friends a favor, and FORWARD this
article to their email addresses. It might be the biggest gift you ever
give them.
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